CAMDEN — On January 4, 2026, the world lost a spirited, intelligent, kind, principled, and talented soul when Mary Marguerite Nordlie Carlson of Camden, Maine, passed away due to complications from congestive heart failure. 

Mary was born in Willmar, Minnesota, on June 3, 1936, the youngest child and only daughter of Peter Conrad Nordlie and Myrtle Spindler Nordlie. 

She grew up in the small town of New London, Minnesota, in a family that placed a high value on education, but career options considered appropriate for women at the time were more limited than those available to her three older brothers, who all became doctors of the MD or PhD varieties, so Mary chose to become an elementary school teacher. While attending college at St. Cloud State Teachers College, Mary’s participation in the college orchestra as pianist and bass clarinetist introduced her to her future husband, the handsome string bass player, Gilman Regenous Carlson, Jr. They married immediately after her college graduation, and Gil’s decision to join the U.S. Navy marked the beginning of decades of travel and adventures for the couple.

The small-town girl turned into a woman of the world. In her twenty years as the wife of a naval officer, Mary discovered talents for all the role entailed. She excelled as a hostess, provided support for the needs of fellow spouses, demonstrated strength and flexibility, and managed the many, many relocations of family and household with incredible efficiency and grace. She reveled in the opportunities to explore the various cultures, both foreign and domestic, of Gil’s duty stations and their environs, while making the constant moves less stressful and more exciting for the family that grew to include three children: a daughter, Elizabeth, born in Albuquerque, New Mexico; a daughter, Paula, born in San Diego, California; and a son, Jonathan, born in Groton, Connecticut.

While Gil’s career made it difficult for Mary to pursue a teaching career, she kept busy with a variety of other jobs. She was able to use her training to work with young people in a kindergarten teaching stint in Rota, Spain, and as the host of a children’s story hour in Virginia Beach. After Gil’s retirement she worked at the Maryland General Assembly in Annapolis for their legislative reference service, and as a staff member to two different state legislators. Later she fulfilled a long-held dream of running a bed and breakfast which she did for a number of years in an 1800’s farmhouse in Rappahannock County, Virginia, with Gil in the supporting role of handyman.

Music was a passion that spanned most of Mary’s life. She began playing piano when her hands were barely large enough, and soon her proficiency had her playing at church and accompanying at school concerts. Playing only for family for many years, Mary later found opportunities to share with wider audiences when as a retiree she began playing regularly at a nursing home in Warrenton, Virginia, and then at Quarry Hill, the senior community in Camden, Maine, where she spent the last twelve years of her life. Playing over a thousand concerts, she prided herself in never playing the exact program twice. Her well-attended concerts brought lively joy into the common room until her physical condition forced her to stop. She also held positions on various residents’ committees and advocated for her fellow community members.

Mary also had a knack for writing which began with newspaper articles and columns produced for publications circulated in the navy community and evolved to include a large collection of short stories and essays shared with family and friends, including members of a writing group that she formed and sustained for many years. Her writing carried her hallmark wit and insight. Her most ambitious and profound work was a book-length tribute to Emily Jane, her granddaughter who was lost in the Virginia Tech shooting at age 18. A companion to Mary’s love of writing was her voracious reading habit, something that sustained her until her final days.

Something Mary will be especially remembered for was her ability to maintain a sense of positivity, humor, and perspective in the face of challenges large and small. The greatest challenges of her life unfolded after she and Gil relocated from Virginia to Camden, Maine. They delighted in the charming coastal town, but there they endured many losses commencing with the tragic death of Emily Jane. In 2013, Gil’s precipitous decline due to Parkinsonism forced them to give up their beautiful home and move into an apartment at Quarry Hill. Soon after Gil’s death in 2014, Mary was devastated by the loss of a second grandchild when her only grandson, Declan, succumbed to an epileptic seizure at the age of 18. Mary’s spirits were buoyed by the companionship of her Maine Coon cat, Meeka, but then Meeka’s passing was another blow. Mary herself began to experience increasing pain and declining mobility related to arthritis, and she experienced heart problems including a stroke and congestive heart failure.

Seeing her painful final years was difficult for friends and family members, yet they have many positive memories to cherish: Mary and Gil gliding gracefully across the dance floor, the couple’s joy in travelling extensively around Europe, Mary’s fascination with nature, her joy in adding a jazzy touch to nearly every song she played on the piano, her love of red cars, her amusing habit of driving miles out of her way to avoid making a left turn across oncoming traffic, as well as her willingness to speak her mind, and her ability to be at once irreverent and respectful. Mary was a brave and kind woman who loved her family, her friends, and the rich opportunities that life afforded her, and who remained sharp and maintained her curiosity into her final days.

Mary is survived by her elder daughter, Elizabeth Hilscher and husband Eric Hilscher; her younger daughter, Paula Saddler and her husband Bryan Saddler; her son, Jonathan Carlson and his partner Jenny Dow; her granddaughter Erica Garvey and her husband Jed Garvey; her granddaughter Teresa Saddler and her husband Ben Ward; her great-grandson, Hayden Garvey and her great-granddaughter, Lily Garvey.

The family will have a private memorial gathering later this year.

Condolences and memories may be shared at www.longfuneralhomecamden.com.