This Sunday morning as I write this is Father’s Day in the United States. While the idea of a day set aside for father’s goes back centuries at least, the current American observance only goes back a bit over 100 years, according to Mr. Wikipedia.

Following the recognition of Mother’s Day in the early 20th Century, Sonora Smart Dodd, raised along with her four younger brothers by her father following her mother’s death, successfully petitioned her church that a day should be set aside to honor fathers, as well. A nationwide tradition was born.

I love this origin story. At a time when I see some flux in the understanding of masculinity, the fact that the original tradition was developed to recognize a man who took on the nurturing role of raising his children alone is heartwarming to me.

I have written some about my father. With a biological father who passed before my dad was three, my father never really had a consistent father figure. His stepfather, John O’Brien, was around, but I believe that he wasn’t openly welcomed by my grandmother, particularly when my father was young. 

I get the sene that some of the male figures in my father’s life when he was young were less than fantastic role models.

My father did tell me about coaches and other men in the community who looked out for him — not to mention John O’Brien, who would surreptitiously attend his ball games — but this was a poor substitute for a dad.

I wish my father was here so I could question him more about what it was like for him to become a father. But I knew him well, and I suspect it was frankly terrifying. I am sure he questioned himself, his ability to be the right kind of dad for his three boys. Was he perfect? Of course not, he could be canotakourous, he could get overwhelmed by work and kids and home. It is all very relatable from where I am now.

I hope he knew, at the time of his passing, surrounded by his three boys and their families, that he did good. He did incredibly good.

I certainly don’t have all the answers when it comes to being a good father. Maybe it is being aware that you don’t have all the answers is what it takes. It is okay to mess up, to be vulnerable, to be scared. From that moment that you first hold this wiggling, wrinkly little human, and it looks into your eyes, and really sees you… You just need to do the best you can. 

I am incredibly fortunate to have two older men currently in my life who have been there: Allen, my father-in-law and grandfather to my children; and Don, who must never have suspected that when he took that widow up the road for a ride in his truck seven or so years ago, that he would become a grandfather figure to a whole new bunch of grandchildren.

These guys get it, having raised their own kids, and been anxious, and unsure, and made mistakes.

Being a father means being there, and being willing to learn and adjust and adapt.

I recently spent a little time with a young man who I still sometime think of as the 11 year old I met 16 years ago. He is grown now, and celebrating his first Father’s Day with the most adorable chubby little boy. Seeing that man, with his son in his lap, staring and smiling and grabbing at everything he sees, and I see a man transformed. His life will never be the same, regardless of what happens in the future.

So thanks to the dads. Those driving you crazy and those long gone. Those who stepped up, those who are the sole caregiver. And to the “”bonus dads” — the uncles and friends, teachers and coaches, who take that fatherly role, and help mold our young people.

It is okay to be scared, to not really know what you are doing. Just do your best.

Juneteenth LIA Potluck

This Thursday, June 19, at 5:30 p.m. the Lincolnville Improvement Association will be holding its meeting at Tranquility Grange on 2171 Belfast Road.

Following the potluck supper, Erik Brooks, trail supervisor for Camden Hills State Park, will lead a panel of people involved with the Lincolnville Trails Initiative. This initiative is aimed at working with Lincolnville residents, Camden Hills State Park, and Tanglewood to explore existing and historical trails as well as potential new trails.

Bring a dish to share, and BYOB should you desire, and join the LIA and community for supper and a discussion.

The LIA will also be collecting beach toys for the Beach Toy Box at the shore. The 2024 storms wiped out the previous toy box, but it is back to provide for the visiting and local children spending a summer day at Lincolnville Beach.

Library Happenings

On Tuesday, June 17, from 3-5 p.m. the needlework group will be meeting, all skill levels welcome.

Wednesday, June 18, from 4:30 to 5:30, the library will host “Basic Internet Safety”, a class to help with navigating the potential perils on the internet. Register fro the course by calling the library at 207-706-3896.

Unfortunately, due to the federal government canceling the National Digital Equity Act’s funding, this will be the last Internet Safety course offered for the foreseeable future. The library is actively exploring ways to raise funds for this, and hope that the federal funding may be reinstated in the future.

Also on June 18, there will be a talk presented by Dr. David Urquia: A Maine Soldier in Sheridan’s Cavalry; His Fight at St. Mary’s Church, and His Life as a POW in Richmond.

Finally, on Saturday morning, June 21, the Library will host “Chalk it up to Summer!” Lemonade, stories, and lots of chalk drawing on the library’s newly paved parking lot.

LCS-PTO

The parent teacher organization at Lincolnville Central School has had one heck of a year. They raised over $20,000 dollars through fundraising and various events that they hosted, involving over 70 volunteers. In turn, the gave over $25,000 back to the school, in the form of school supplies, clothing, food pantry donations, food cards for families, and staff support events.

As my last child has now left LCS, it is so good to see the support the parents and community offer out little local school. Community matters people.

Enjoy the week, Lincolnville. I hope you have a fantastic one, and make the most of the waning days of June. Reach out, at ceobrien246@gmail.com, and spare a thought for your old dad.

Municipal Calendar

Monday, June 16

Historical Society Museum Open, 1 p.m. to 4 p.m., 33 Beach Road

Tuesday, June 17

Library open 3-6 p.m. 208 Main Street

AA Meeting 12:15 p.m., Community Building, 18 Searsmont Road

Wednesday, June 18

Library Open, 2-5 p.m., 208 Main Street

Historical Society Museum Open, 1 p.m. to 4 p.m., 33 Beach Road

MCSWC Board of Directors, 6:30 p.m., Camden Town Office

Bayshore Baptist Church, Youth Group, 6 p.m.

Thursday, June 19

Juneteenth, Town Office Closed

Friday, June 20

AA Meeting 12:15 p.m., Community Building, 18 Searsmont Road

Library open 9-12, 208 Main Street

Historical Society Museum Open, 1 p.m. to 4 p.m., 33 Beach Road

Saturday, June 21

Library open 9-12, 208 Main Street

Sunday, June 22

United Christian Church, 9:30 a.m. Worship and Children’s Church, 18 Searsmont Road

Bayshore Baptist Church, 10 a.m. Sunday School for All Ages, 10:40 a.m. Coffee and Baked Goods, 11:00 a.m. worship, 2648 Atlantic Highway