OK. OK. I admit it. Whenever one of my pieces gets published in the Pilot, I check the “Most Popular” sidebar to see if I made and if I did, where I scored. I learned a long time ago to not expect people to like what I write, but if they read it, it’s worth something.

My columns rarely make the list, but they keep asking for more, so I must be doing something right. After watching this list for several months, I noticed an interesting trend. Even if I make the list, I almost always get beat by an obituary. That got me thinking about obituaries.

First off, your obituary should be a surprise. (If not to you, at least to the people that read it.) What could be worse than having people think that you’ve been dead for years before your death? Living is important, and I mean really living a life. No matter your age, if you’re just idling along, give some thought to putting that baby in drive and gassing on it. Don’t let people miss you before you’re gone.

We all live extraordinary lives but we don’t realize that; others do, however, when they hear our stories. Try telling your story a little more while you’re still alive, not to brag but to let people know what you’ve been up to. You will be surprised how what you regard as your every-day life events are not so every-day when viewed by others.

While most might think that an obituary should be a report on a life, I think it should tell a story, and the best ones do.

You cannot make the story up at the end. It doesn’t work that way. Some people write their own obituary and while I respect that, there’s something quite troubling about not trusting your survivors to tell the whole story or worrying that a key point might be left out.

I believe a good obituary should make people jealous. Not jealous that you’re dead, although some might feel that way, but jealous of the life you lived.

And here’s the thing: If you are inspiring people in your life, your obituary will inspire people, too. You see, it’s not about listing all the groups you belonged to, or the public service you did, or how many kids and grandkids you had — like the person with the highest number wins.

It’s about telling a story of a life filled with good times, good people, and making a difference in some way. Oh. And being happy. That’s a big one. We don’t put enough emphasis on being happy. People who have lived happy lives have obituaries that reflect that. That’s something else that you can go to work on anytime. Today would be a good time to start.

I’m going to keep working on my obituary by living each day to the fullest. I’m no longer jealous when I get beat out by an obituary in the “Most Popular” sidebar; rather, I’m curious to learn more about what kind of life that person lived.

And just for the record, Penobscot Bay Pilot will be celebrating many, many, many years in business before my obituary makes it into the “Most Popular” sidebar.