Dear Old Guy welcomes letters on all subjects, including love, marriage, child rearing, even basic plumbing and medical advice. What he doesn’t know, he is happy to make up. After all, he’s just an opinionated Old Guy. Submit your questions to Dear Old Guy here.

Dear Old Guy,

          If anyone would know it would be you. Do dogs get really get Alzheimer’s? I can’t get a straight answer from my vet, who wants to perform a lot of tests before prescribing some expensive medications.

           Signed, What was my question?

Dear What was,

          What vet do you use? He or she may suspect you have dementia of the wallet. But, in a word, yes. Dogs can suffer Alzheimer’s.

Now, before I get started I have to tell you, before consulting my expert, I believed all dogs were born with dementia. I mean just look at them wandering around the house, going room to room with the look on their faces and which beg the question, why did I come in here? Or watch how they endlessly chase a stick and bring it back to you, forgetting that they have done this a 100 times already. The real kicker is watching a dog bury his treat in the couch and then coming back for more like you never gave him one. As I said, why wouldn’t anyone think dogs are born with dementia?

As for our canine friends actually developing a form of Alzheimer’s in old age, there is no doubt. Dog brains can go through the same sorts of changes as their human counterparts. There are certain signs besides just general behavior changes in older dogs. As I wrote above, these behaviors are what we often see in our pets anyway, but taken as a whole may indicate a problem. Pay attention if your old dog can’t learn new tricks and—

● seems lost or trapped in familiar places;

● is no longer answering to her name or following commands that were once familiar;

● wanders aimlessly, has developed shakes, messes indoors and is no longer interested in play; and

● is easily startled and no longer wished to leave the house.

There are more symptoms but the above list is a start. If it turns out your dog does have dementia then there are some very personal decisions to be made.

By the way, the best book I ever read about dogs is a novella called Dr. Beagle. I know it can be ordered online.

The book is a must read for all dog lovers and those concerned with world peace. —O.G. 

Dear Old Guy,

The older I become the less I seem to care about what others think about me. Well, most of the time. It seems that in my small town there are lots of people who talk about me. I have always tried to kept to myself and do my best to offer a smile and a kind word. When I can’t, I just keep quiet. Despite that, sometimes things get back to me, about me, that are downright mean and not remotely true. How does one avoid taking such awful stuff personally and not feel defensive because of it?

I would love to live the philosophy of Eleanor Roosevelt, You wouldn't worry so much about what others think of you if you realized how seldom they do, but I don’t know if I can when I am so often the center of negative attention.

Signed, Trying not to give them something to talk about

Dear trying not,

          I’m going to have to charge you for asking two questions… then again, what’s the point, because I hear you’re slow to pay… but assuming that’s not true and I won’t have to send a debt collector with a pit bull to your door, let’s take a look—

          In truth, all this bad stuff you keep hearing back about yourself is like quick sand. The more you struggle in it the faster you will sink.

May I guess that there is one person in your life, such as a co-worker or an ex or sister or someone you sort of, kind of, trust who is sharing all these rumors with you? That’s been my experience. And what it took me a long time to learn is that the person telling you the awful things is really not your friend; furthermore, there is a good chance he or she is the source of the rumors and in all likelihood taking your responses and using them against you with the other parties.

In essence, you may find you are in conflicts whose origins are a fiction created your supposed friend. Why does the person do this? Simple. It’s all about power and control. The sooner you eliminate that meddling person the sooner you can get your life in order.

Now, for your second question. Eleanor Roosevelt was a bright woman who had her fair share of scandal and gossip to live down despite what a truly great person she was. Use her quote in conjunction with what I wrote above and ignore the old adage, don’t shoot the messenger. I think it’s okay to shoot the messenger if the messenger has an ulterior motive for sharing. Let me know what you find out and I’ll spread it around. —O.G.

Dear Old Guy,    

Men! I'm just so fed up with failed relationships. Sure, it's partly my fault because during the "honeymoon period" I am guilty of ignoring red flags because I really want it to work and I want the guy to be what I envision and not what he really is. Are there truly any guys out there who are witty, kind, honest, romantic, and not totally unpleasant to look at?

Signed, Say It's Not Me

Dear Say it’s not,

          Sorry. I don’t think people really ignore the red flags at the start of a relationship. I think they squirrel those flags away to use later. It goes with my long standing theory that, when first getting to know a prospective partner, people will catalog away things that they can later use as important wedge issues when it comes time to break up. The guy will think to himself, Gee, she smokes cigarettes. I can ignore that for now but if I find I don’t like her in general I can blame my distain of smoking… and the woman will think he doesn’t earn much but if I find he’s a lousy lover I can blame our breakup on the fact that he works nights and I miss him. See? That’s all you yourself are doing. It’s perfectly normal. That said, if you think that sort of behavior is getting in the way of true intimacy, you can decide to stop it and take more time in getting to know someone. In short don’t be so fast to put all your chickens in one egg.

          As to your other question Are there truly any guys out there who are witty, kind, honest, romantic, and not totally unpleasant to look at? Your criteria is not impossible (in fact, I might be finding myself on the market soon so stay in touch); it just might not be possible around here. If I sound cynical just remember, I’m Dear Old Guy. That’s me! —O.G.